*ring* *ring*

Brandi stumb's to the phone and looks at the clock. 11:38p.m.

Brandi: Hello?!

D: HEY!

Brandi: What?

D: HEY!

Brandi: I heard you the first time.What the *bleep* are you doing?

D: Guess what?

Brandi: What?

D: I'm drunk!!!!!!

Brandi: No dip sherlock!

D: How did you know?

Brandi: I'm psychic.

D: Cool! My girlfriend can see the future.

Brandi: Excuse me?

D: You are my gf right?

*silence*

Brandi: Uh, yeah...Sure...If you say so...Uh huh! *strange sound* What was that?

D: S just puked all over my truck!

Brandi: Great! Are the truck god's about to kill him?

D: No, but I am!

Brandi: Uuuh huh! Why did you call me? What is it after 12 there?

D: Yep!

Brandi: And your drunk, not to mention you have to work tomorrow, erm, later today.

D: Yep!

Brandi: Ok, making sure I had all the facts here.

D: You sound tired

Brandi: Well, make's sence...Since I was a sleep.

D: Oh...Well, your a wake now.

Brandi: *mummbles* Yeah, unfortunetly.

D: What?

Brandi: Nothing...So, what are the pimp daddy's doin' this early, VERY early morning?

D: Gettin' drunk.

Brandi: Yeah, i think we covered that base...Anything else?

D: No, not really.

Brandi: Party animals...To darn wild, I tell ya!

D: I know. Maybe you should come give me a spanking.

Brandi: Yeah, I'm on my way. I'll be there in about a month or two. Depending on how much traffic I catch between there, and here.

D: DUDE! He just puked again!

Brandi: Aaw, poor guy...*more gross sounds* I could really live without hearing this.

D: My truck could live with out it too.

Brandi: Babe, it's a T-R-U-C-K!! Not a human...Just a truck!

D: Not just a truck...My life.

Brandi: Oh, I thought your hair was your life. Sorry, guess I missed that memo!

*laughter*

S: Guess she told you, dude!

Brandi: I knew I loved him for a reason!

D: Why is that?

Brandi: Because he always side's with me! HA!

D: I side with you.

Brandi: Ok, then say "It's just a truck!"

D: Your out of your damn missourian mind! Not saying it!

Brandi: Ok then...Your not on my side.

D: How can you argue no matter what time it is?

Brandi: It's a gift. You'll learn to love it.

D: *laughs* If you think so.

Brandi: I do, because you don't have a choice.

D: Oh, I don't?

Brandi: Nope! Sorry, not this time.

D: Oh, so you have control over me?

Brandi: Obviously. You call me almost everyday, and you drunk dialed me. You only drunk dial the one's you love, or hate. And ya better not hate me.

D: I don't hate you...I'll go with love.

Brandi: Face it, sweetie. Your under my spell, so get use to it!

*laughs*

D: Forcful aren't we?

Brandi: Darn right! Gotta be with a man.

D: Why do I feel like you just called us stupid?

Brandi: I didn't call ya'll stupid...Just not to bright. Women light up the Christmas tree, not the guys.

D: You know, that actually made sense to me.

Brandi: Oh no. My non-scense is making sence to you. Another sign that I'm working on you. You might wanna get exorsized. *laughs*

D: That's ok. I think I can live with this demon.

Brandi: But, that's the thing. I'm not a demon. I'm an Angel, undercover.

D: *laughs* Were you sent here to bring me great joy, and all that stuff from God?

Brandi: You could say that. *laughs*

D: Thank you, Jesus!

Brandi: Say's the drunk man.

*laughs*

D: *say's something not understandable*

Brandi: What?

D: Oh, sorry. I told S to get his drunk butt out of my truck.

Brandi: Don't you mean your life?

D: What?

Brandi: You said your truck was your life. So actually you told him to get out of your life.

D: Uuuuh

Brandi: Your so mean. *laughs*

D: Uh huh

Brandi: I find me very funny at 12:15 in the morning.

D: You are actually funny. Do you even think when you talk, or do you just say whatever comes to your mind?

Brandi: I usually don't think. Which make's sense why I'm always sticking my foot in my mouth.

D: But that's why we love you.

Brandi: I know...It's a curse. I swear!

D: Let me ask you something

Brandi: Um, ok.

D: Marry me.

Brandi: What?

D: You heard me.

Brandi: Ok, D...You've officially lost it. How much have you had to drink tonight?

D: I don't know.

Brandi: Do me a favor, ok?

D: Ok.

Brandi: If you can ask me that when your not drunk, then I'll give you an answer. However, I feel like I won't ever have to answer that.

D: You talk to fast, but ok.

Brandi: Are you home?

D: Just got home.

Brandi: Go upstairs and go to bed.

D: Ok.

Brandi: Don't forget to set your alarm clock.

D: I won't, mother hen!

Brandi: Someone needs to be! Hee hee!

D: I think I can handle setting my alarm clock, and going to bed.

Brandi: I would hope so.

D: *bleep* *bleep*

Brandi: What did you do?

D: I walked up the stairs, and thought there was another step. And there wasn't, and I lost my footing, and about fell down the stairs.

Brandi dies laughing

D: It's not really that funny!

Brandi: *tries to catch breath* If you could see the mental picture I had, you would be laughing too!

D: I don't want to know what goes on in that head of yours!

Brandi: MINE? What about you? Do I need to bring up the "Let's go chase kitty cats, in the wide open green fields with daisy's growing wild" again?

D: Was I drunk when I said that?

Brandi: Sadly enough, no you weren't.

D: WOW! That's scary.

Brandi: Tell me about.

Brandi start's to sing "Tell me about. Tell me all about your broken heart..."

Brandi: Sorry...

D: OK! Alarm is set, and I'm in bed....with you.

Brandi: Wishful thinking there, babe!

D: *yawn* I know.

Brandi: Ok, you better go to sleep. Gotta be at work in what? 6 hours?

D: If that!

Brandi: Exactly! Babe, that is why you get drunk on weekends.

D: Maybe you should move out here to keep me in line.

Brandi: Again, wishful thinking! *laughs*

D: Your never going to move out here are you?

Brandi: Babe, go to sleep, ok?

D: Ok...Call you tomorrow.

Brandi: Later today...

D: Whatever.

Brandi: Just make sure your not drunk this time, and it's before tomorrow.

D: Even that made sense.

Brandi: RUN DUSTY RUN!

*laughs*

D: Night, hun!

Brandi: Night!

D proceed's to drop the phone, say a few *bleeps*, and I lay in the frontroom and laugh for almost an hour.


DORK! DORK! DORK! That is him. He really shouldn't have a cell phone when he's drunk. Dork!