Don't guess I can yell about CMT anymore. They have been playing ED more here lately. So, I guess I could be happy with them for a moment or two! Maybe...

It was so funny. I was in here listening to "Good People", and Brooklyn walk's in. She was like, "What are you doing? ... Hey, who's that?" I said, "Who's who?" She said, "On your computer singing." I said, "Oh! That's Jeff Bates." So, she started listening, and she was like, "He's good. I like him." I said, "Yeah! Meeee too!" So, I grabbed the cd case, and said, "Here's what he looks like." She took it, and looked at it, and went, "HOLY CRAP! He is HOT!" The look on her face was priceless. I got to laughing so hard, I almost snorted. I've taught her so well. *pat's self on the back* HA! HA!

I have Rodney Atkins - If Your Goin' Through Hell stuck in my head. The first few time's I heard that song, I thought it was Tim McGraw. I was like, "Holy! Finally, a song of his I like." Then I found-out it was Rodney. Awesome. It's a pretty righteous song. (Sorry, that's my new word!)

Do most of my post's consist of music? Do I talk about music that much? I realized that I know more about music, than pretty much anything else. Is that sad? I can't help it. I love music. Maybe more than I love the internet...Maybe!

I realized Friday night that Autumn and I have a lot in common. When she was little her real parent's abused her. Physically, and sexually. And we were talking, and it amazed me. That even though I have never been through anything like that, I actually could relate to a lot of the stuff she was saying. Like what she goes through, the panic attacks, the feeling of uncomforablness around a lot of people, depression, and so forth. I didn't think her, and I had a lot in common, but I guess we do. It was nice to finally be able to find someone who could relate to a lot of the thing's that I go through. Even though our past's are different, the result's are the same in a lot of ways. It's just kind-of mind-boggling. I don't know. You can only relate to someone who hasn't gone through stuff like that, so much. But when you find someone who can relate to you 100% it's completely different. It's like finding your outlet, of knowing that, hey, I'm not the only one that feels this. I'm not the only one that goes through this. It's rather pretty nice, actually. We both kind-of agreed with each other that at time's are live's feel like we're trapped in a living hell. It's almost like there's a chain locked on your ankle, and no matter how hard you try to break-it, it won't. It just keep's snapping you back. And it can be just anything bad that's happened in our lives. Rather it was something we went through when we were younger, bad relationships, or whatever. It's like a never ending cycle. Sometime's, I think I need theropy. Not that it's a bad thing or anything...Because it's not. Like, Felicia say's she understand's everything I go through. But I know she doesn't. No one does, until they go through something that put's them in that situation of going through what you are. People scare me. Let me rephrase that...People I don't know, scare me. I don't trust people in general. They have to earn my trust. It's easier to earn with some, but not with all. Building walls around myself, is an understatment. I think I have mountain's, now.

*sigh* I don't know where all that came from, but it feels good to let it out! :)


Currently listening to: Keep Your Hands To Yourself - Sawyer Brown

Nikki [ 3:33 PM ]

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